How to fall asleep in under one minute!

"Sleeping is no mean art: for its sake one must stay awake all day." ~Friedrich Nietzsche

I'm getting kind of annoyed with these so called sponsored pins on Pinterest.  You know which ones I mean.  They say "Pinned for you" and really, they're not.  They're completely promotional.  Some days I wade through a dozen or so of these in order to see the pins I actually want to see, the ones of people I actually follow.  

Anywho......I pinned something a couple of weeks ago, and finally thought I world give it a try.  Since I work nights, sleeping at night on my nights off, can sometimes be a challenge.  Like last night, I was up until 3:30 tossing and turning.   And than couldn't wake up this morning.

It was one of these promotional pins, by higherperspectives.com, and the comment said,  "Trouble sleeping?  How to fall asleep in under one minute."  This was great.   Exactly what I could use.   So tonight I decided to try it.   And just to make sure things were definitely in my favor,  I made sure I had spritzed a lavender spray on my sheets and had my eye mask on.   I wasn't taking any chances.

So I started.   Basically,  you inhale over four seconds, hold it for seven seconds,  and then exhale over eight seconds.  Sounds easy,  right?  WRONG! Do you know how difficult it is to alter your breathing pattern in order to count like this?

The first couple of rounds, I literally thought I was going to die.   I guess with my first inhalation I didn't take a deep enough breath,  so I quickly ran out of oxygen long before I had to exhale.  So then I  panicked. Over the next couple of breaths I managed to regulate my breathing somewhat better.  By about 4 minutes in, I was in somewhat of a pattern.  But wait!  This was way over a minute to fall asleep!  So, way not worth it as far as I'm concerned.  And I kept going.  Three minutes later, I was still there wondering how long it was going to take to fall asleep.  So I stopped.  And then was asleep a couple of minutes later.  I guess I really tired myself out trying this trick.  

So, I'll just still with my lavender spray, my eye mask and just try to think happy thoughts that will hopefully put me to sleep, all by myself!  And maybe, just maybe, this won't happen:

From my board "The first wealth is health."